The Forced Language of The Crown

If state appointments now mirror the genealogy of a select few, why should infrastructure be spared? The Dramatized Irony: When Silence Becomes Consent This is not just satire. It is sorrow wrapped in metaphor. A country that fears to name injustice is a country slowly complicit in it. Where is the outcry from the North, the lament from the East, the resistance from Buganda?

Uganda Today EditionThe Forced Language of The Crown


Uganda Today News Desk
Published: May 8, 2025

Introduction: When Geography Becomes Genealogy

In today’s Uganda, power no longer emanates from democratic will or constitutional ideals. Instead, it courses through bloodlines, tribal familiarity, and geographic exclusivity. What once aspired to be a republic now echoes the slow drumbeats of a dynasty—what some have quietly come to call the Bachwezi State.

In this piece, I present a rhetorical proposition. If power, wealth, and governance are concentrated in one region and one lineage, let’s not pretend. Let’s rename everything—from roads to rivers, from ministries to mosquito nets. Let satire, sorrow, and suppressed truth share one stage.

I. Of Roads and Regimes: From Lumumba Avenue to ‘Rukungiri Crescent’

If state appointments now mirror the genealogy of a select few, why should infrastructure be spared?

Let Lumumba Avenue be baptized Muhoozi Motorway. Its symbolism is no longer resistance but inheritance. Kololo, once a diplomatic crest, could now be known as Rwakitara Ridge. And the Entebbe Expressway, gateway to State House, deserves a more transparent name: Ankole Express.

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This is not a call for tribalism—it is a mirror held up to it.

Reimagining the capital: If history is erased in appointments, why not on street signs too?

II. When Lakes Lose Their Names and Trees Begin to Speak Runyankore

If state power is a river that flows in one direction, then rename the river.

Let Lake Victoria be renamed Lake Muhoozi—not for hydrology, but for hierarchy. Let River Nile flow anew as Rwamugasha Stream, symbolic of national resources channelled along ancestral fault lines.

Why stop there? Mabira Forest becomes Obugabe Woodland, a shrine not of biodiversity but of bloodline supremacy. And let Mount Elgon, towering yet forgotten, be humbled into Rwenzururu Minor—a shadow beneath the mountain of monarchy.

When waters are named for rulers, does the republic still run deep? 

III. Institutions or Ancestral Estates?

Today’s Judiciary speaks less of justice than of loyalty. The military resembles a homestead more than a national force. Parliament? A theatre with marionettes whose strings are tied not to voters, but to blood.

When nepotism becomes institutional logic, we don’t just lose opportunity—we lose national identity.

Kampala, Uganda: Coat of Arms of Uganda, facade of the Parliament of the Republic of Uganda – photo by M.Torres

Kampala, Uganda: Coat of Arms of Uganda, facade of the Parliament of the Republic of Uganda – photo by M.Torres

IV. Rename the Republic: The People’s Clan of Bachwezi

Let us abandon pretense. If statehood is inherited, let us rename the state.

Call it The People’s Clan of Bachwezi. Let the passport read: “Issued by the Dynasty”. The Coat of Arms? A long-horned cow, a milk gourd, and a western compass. Rewrite the national anthem—in Runyankore, of course—and replace “For God and My Country” with “For Kin and Crown.”

If the republic is reborn as royalty, should our documents reflect dynasty?

V. The Dramatized Irony: When Silence Becomes Consent

This is not just satire. It is sorrow wrapped in metaphor. A country that fears to name injustice is a country slowly complicit in it. Where is the outcry from the North, the lament from the East, the resistance from Buganda?

What is more dangerous than a captured republic? A comfortable colony. One where subjects mistake silence for peace.

When silence rules, who really governs 

Conclusion: A Call to Rethink the Meaning of Uganda

This is not a call to hatred—it is a call to healing. But healing begins with truth. A diverse, equitable Uganda cannot be built on a throne of tribal favoritism.

Until then, we live not in a republic—but in a renamed estate. Not in Uganda—but under the rising shadow of a dynasty masquerading as democracy.

Let us dare to dream again.
Let us dare to rename—this time, not in surrender, but in pursuit of restoration.

Woe to those who make unjust laws, to those who issue oppressive decrees.” – Isaiah 10:1

Published by www.ugandatoday.co.ug, your trusted source for news and analysis

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Chris Kato

Uganda Today is a source of analytical, hard and entertaining news for audiences of all categories in Uganda and internationally. Uganda Today cut its teeth in Ugandan media industry with its print copies hitting the streets in October 2014. We are heavily indebted to all our publics and stakeholders who support our cause in one way or the other. To comment on our stories, or share any news or pertinent information, please follow us on: Facebook: Uganda Today Twitter: @ugtodaynews WhatsApp:+256 702 239 337 Email: ugandatodayedition@gmail.com Website: https://www.ugandatoday.co.ug

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