By Kenneth Krysestom Kakande
Moses Ali was just enjoying his reverie, almost lulling him to sleep, when Nambooze, a celebrated troll, suggested that he be nominated for Deputy Speaker. Thunder-struck, the old man attempted to rise from his chair, oblivious of what was happening. He cast a surprised glance over his shoulders, left and right, just to ensure he had heard right, and yes indeed, it was his very name that fell from the mouth of this Mukono woman MP. The cameras, anyone could tell, loved his what-have-I-done-this-time look.
Throwing a gibe here and there, sprinkling her hearty speech with controversial terms like “old age” and “unopposed”, the cunning virago went ahead to rock that mic as though basking in the elation of her own inebriation. In today’s parlance, we could say it was as though she was high on weed. She knows how to play smart, dumb and innocent. She knows how to use her tools of malice, and it worked as the people from West Nile went incandescently furious. Realizing success, Nambooze steps to the side as though nothing had happened. As the attacked continue to knock their heads like it’s a bull fight, Moses Ali, evidently peeved, ends it all with a simple “I decline the offer”, and Nambooze, as innocent as they come, takes to her seat, registering her contribution in the very first “sitting”, repping her Mukono people.