Ayella Amuru takes time to explain the pragmatism of impermanence not only about life but literally about every thing in the universe.
A dying 79-year-old friend who lost his wife asked for my company some weeks back and he seemed to be having difficulty with facing death. He sent me WhatsApp messages and I went to check on him.
I told him impermanence, flux, change is characteristic of everything that there is. There isn’t anything in the whole world, in the material world, in the psychological world and in the spiritual world that you can hang onto as a form of security—NOTHING. Not only is there nothing you can hang onto, there is also no “YOU” to hang onto things. All clinging to life is an attempt to fetch water with a fishing net or trying to grasp smoke with your hand by forming a fist.
I told my friend that existence and non-existence are the same; you cannot have one without the other. You cannot have night without day, you cannot have up without down, you cannot have pleasure without pain, you cannot have life without death and neither can there be death without life—these things go together. A complete life therefore must include death; you cannot live half a life in which there is only life without death. Look at the trees on your compound, during the sunny season, the leaves dry & fall off and during the rainy season, fresh leaves emerge but the tree remains. Look at that tree as life and look at those leaves as the comings and goings of human beings. You will always have life, what you are afraid of is the memory you have accumulated coming to an end. Death is only the ending of personhood memory. Life on the other hand cannot die because life is energy.
We drank more whisky and finally I felt like it was time for me to leave, my friend called me yesterday and said; for some weird reason Mr. Ayella ever since we spoke and I accepted my impermanence and stopped clinging onto anything, I have been very happy. Nothing bothers me anymore; I intend to share whatever life has offered me with everyone else, even when I am in pain, suffering and frustrated, I know it is impermanent just like happiness, pleasure and peace are also impermanent—everything is in constant change, everything is temporary.
Death is just like child birth, everything is like a weaving of smoke. Be not afraid. When the time comes it will be like as if you never existed, may be you were never born and will never die, you are like the leaves on the tree, coming and going. Thank you my friend.